I DID IT

I took four finals (ochem, physics, ecology and music theory) all within 24 hours of each other... and I lived. I'm off to Bosch. Peace!

Happy Christmas Harry

The First Grader

Finals Mix

Can Nate get any cuter???? I've seen him live...... 4 times.............. squeel giggles boy crush sigh. I posted the original here back when it came out in Sept. YAY FUN.

Sunshine Dust

It's easy to define yourself based on those around you. Individuality isn't easy. You can't just go stick a tattoo on your ass and call it a day. You have to commit to the values and the life you choose to lead.

When I was little, my room had a window facing west. I would spend what seemed like hours laying on my bed trying to catch the dust particles floating around in the air exposed by the light from the sun setting. I never understood why those little floating things would only appear when the sun shined through my window. And what were they anyway? As a child, I passed up playing barbies, watching TV, and even annoying my older brother to sit, watch and think about the sunshine dust.

Not much has changed... switch out barbies and TV for parties and drinks and an annoying older brother for a boyfriend. Only now, the sunshine dust is more than just floating particles...

that your faith be steadfast as a rock
that no storm can move
that nothing can disturb,
and that it endure through all things
even to the end

As ye have faith
so shall your powers
and blessings be.
This is the balance --
this is the balance --
this is the balance.

'Abdu'l-Bahá
An Early Pilgrimage, p. 40

Presenting.....

Tadaaaaa!
Thanks to Deanna for being Deanna........... this is fun!!!

Justice

Injustice nags at me.

And I just hope that someday those who have committed the wrongs that lead to injustice, I hope they will one day humbly acknowledge their mistakes and feel compassion for others and guilt for their actions.

O SON OF SPIRIT! The best beloved of all things in My sight is Justice; turn not away therefrom if thou desirest Me, and neglect it not that I may confide in thee. By its aid thou shalt see with thine own eyes and not through the eyes of others, and shalt know of thine own knowledge and not through the knowledge of thy neighbor. Ponder this in thy heart; how it behooveth thee to be. Verily justice is My gift to thee and the sign of My loving-kindness. Set it then before thine eyes.

future bf 1 and 2

http://www.thesartorialist.com/

About life and ochem

Tonight, I opened a bottle of sparkling cider that decided to join me in my jittery Thanksgiving excitement by lavishly rationing itself with the brown carpet floor and wooden table chairs. I was already on my hands and knees with wads of paper towels, profusely giggling and apologizing to Shannon, to notice the sheer joy and delight in the moment.

I'm doing that too much! All the happy moments seems to be whizzing by unnoticed, unacknowledged. It's almost like I've forbidden myself to be rejoice in life here, in being here. Like I'm supposed to be in mourning because I miss my Ecuadorian friends, I miss life filled with hours of service, the smiles of my pre-kinder students. I'm not in love with Tucson or the UA, but that doesn't mean I can't be happy. I need more bottles of sparkling cider to explode all over my kitchen floor.

Some updates about mi vida:

1. I have a new research position! In a pharmacology/toxicology lab. Cancer research - non-Hodgkin's lymphoma but specifically the epigenetic cellular pathways and acetylation. Woo, I start this summer.
2. I'm taking a ballet class next semester........... SO EXCITED.
3. I saw an opera last night. My first one. Now I sing my sentences opera style. So dramatic.
4. I'm going to Bosch for the ISGP. Yay
5. My sister is 15.
6. House is my new favorite television show.
7. I have about five more things to add to my list of diseases/illnesses.
8. I heart winter and llama blankets!

And now I will end my evening by snuggling up with my ochem textbook for some light bedtime reading. :)

Brown suga soul part 2

And OO color! found here

Sam Perkins

In 7th grade I wore a scoliosis brace. Plastic, hole-y, with velcro straps. I looked like a walking tree branch. And wasn't the most popular girl on campus. Sam Perkins was one of the only friends I had. He had spiky hair, freckles and wore a turtle necklace. He liked turtles and music and we were in just about every class together. I remember Mrs. Pomeroy - the 7th grade science teacher (everyone's favorite teacher) loved Sam. Something about his shy, modest, quite stature made you feel comfortable around him. He was one of the only friends I had.

I can't imagine what would've gone through my mind if I had known sitting next to Sam during Mrs. Collin's math classes that I would outlive him. That I would see the sun set tonight and not him. That he would pass away from brain cancer while I'd sit with only a slight headache on my roommate's couch reminded of my own mortality.

Thanks for being my friend. Say hi to Kristen for me. And Liza. <3

How To Be Alone - Tanya Davis

"Society is afraid of alonedom, like lonely hearts are wasting away in basements, like people must have problems if, after a while, nobody is dating them. but lonely is a freedom that breaths easy and weightless and lonely is healing if you make it."

Very true for myself and many of my friends!


Happy birth of Baha'u'llah. A Glorious day, indeed.

Coeur de Pirate

Cœur de Pirate- Wood & Wires Session from Adrian Vieni (Wood & Wires) on Vimeo.


French is next.

back in blogtown

1 2 3,4,5

Watching with an stink eye

Injustice in Iran continues.

Young Baha'is are denied higher education.

Professors part of the BIHE (Baha'i Institute for Higher Education) are sentenced as prisoners who "face vague charges of threatening national security for teaching biology, engineering, architecture and other academic disciplines to young Baha’is denied university education because of their religion."
Their lawyer's been arrested too.

And don't forget about the seven Baha'i leaders. "Their crime, though, is nothing more than being members of the Baha’i Faith, a religion which has been the focus of a systematic, government-sponsored persecution in Iran since the 1979 revolution."


We all know there are many other injustices in the world. But, none have ever been so personal, so close to my heart and the hearts of my friends. I wrote about this a year ago [here]. I stand by what I said. We cannot take what we have for granted. Our most basic and simplest rights are privileges in others eyes. Be thankful for where you are, who you are and what you have. It really is as simple as that.

Want to know more?
Trail of Iran's Seven Baha'i Leaders
Persecution of Baha'is in Iran
Bahieh K's personal story
Rainn Wilson is more than just Dwight

My Babajoon sent me this

An old Italian lived alone in New Jersey . He wanted to plant his annual tomato garden, but it was very difficult work, as the ground was hard.. His only son, Vincent, who used to help him, was in prison. The old man wrote a letter to his son and described his predicament:


Dear Vincent,
I am feeling pretty sad because it looks like I won't be able to plant my tomato garden this year. I'm just getting too old to be digging up a garden plot. I know if you were here my troubles would be over. I know you would be happy to dig the plot for me, like in the old days.
Love ,
Papa


A few days later he received a letter from his son.


Dear Papa,
Don't dig up that garden. That's where the bodies are buried.
Love,
Vinnie


At 4 a.m. the next morning, FBI agents and local police arrived and dug up the entire area without finding any bodies. They apologized to the old man and left. That same day the old man received another letter from his son.


Dear Papa,
Go ahead and plant the tomatoes now. That's the best I could do under the circumstances.
Love you,
Vinnie






Hahahahahahaha

Welllllll helloooo. It's been a while hasn't it. My bad.

My eyelids are drooping right now. They sit at a permanent horizontal position and readily swing down and up, yet my eyes are still stingy from the dry az air. And my back is screaming out more than usual and I feel like a mess. I think half of it is due to mental stress about labs, tests, music notes, choir and the sun (it hurts my skin and freaks me out cuz I'm a hypochondriac) and the other half is because I'm really tired.

Ok now that the complaining is over... lezgetdowntobusiness

Colors + that hair = y

Hello future boyfriend, nice socks.

First Love - Adele

I cut my hair. I love it.

Choir makes me a softy

Thou Hidden Love of God

Thou hidden love of God whose height,
Whose depth unfathomed no one knows,
I see from afar thy beauteous light,
And inly sigh for thy repose;
My heart is pained nor can I be
At rest until I rest in thee.

'Tis mercy all that thou hast brought
My mind to seek its peace in thee;
Yet while I seek, but find thee not,
No peace my wand'ring soul shall see.

O when shall all my wand'rings end,
And all my steps to theeward tend?

Is there a thing beneath the sun
That strives with thee my heart to share?
Ah, tear it thence and reign alone,
The Lord of ev'ry motion there.
Make me thy duteous child that I
May ceaseless "Abba, Father" cry.

Each moment draw from earth away
My heart that lowly waits thy call;
Speak to my inmost soul and say
"I am thy love, thy God, thy all!"
To feel thy pow'r to hear thy voice,
To taste thy love, be all my choice.

My heart is pained, nor can it be at rest,
Until I rest in thee.

-John Wesley 1703-91

FUN.

is back!

Emotional bandaids

Goapele - First Love


Thelonious Monk - Blue Monk


Mozart - Clarinet Concerto in A


Lil' Jon - Outta Your Mind

There's no particular reason to why I posted emotional bandaids... I just thought these songs brought a sense of comfort in their own ways. It's been a hard week though. But it should all be just fine.

O you fancy huh

I LIKE THIS MUSIC but I still hate music theory


I'm not a big Bon Iver fan... but I like this song and I posted this cuz that little guy it totally wearing a sweater that looks identical to the ones in OTAVALO. Coolio


Have I mentioned that I don't like Lady Gaga (SORRY B) and that I hate country music? Well, ironically, the two came together and made a song that I LOVE.


And thanks for J... I listen to Coltrane on my way to school everyday. Swoon.

Music theory is not for dummies

HELLO BLOG

I'm writing at 12:05 AM. Now, why am I not sleeping? Or studying?

Because music theory SMELLS that's why.

Grumble grumble complain complain mumble mumble.

Upcoming travels!

From here...

to here...

to here?

1, 2

I wish! :P

One year already?

A year ago today - I was seeing Ecuador for the first time.











I can't wait to see it again...

I WROTE ANOTHER SONG

And this one is in ENGLISH!



Words by 'Abdul-Baha. HOW FUN.

Not a fan of poetry

But a fan of poets.


i carry your heart

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)

i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)



E.E. CUMMINGS

Spilling my guts

Having scoliosis is more than just having a curvy spine. I feel it. I feel it every moment of every day of my life. I feel the twist. I feel the curve. I feel my hip awkwardly protruding to the right. I feel the discomfort when I stand "normally." I can't remember a time when I couldn't feel it... only I suppose when I was a kid but who pays attention to a structurally normal spine as child? Or who pays attention to a structurally normal spine at all??

My brother likes to call me a hypochondriac. He's got a point. Any little mark on my body seem likes an infected rash that needs immediate medical attention. Sometimes I suspect this little birth mark on my back grows and I think I may have skin cancer from all those years swimming in AZ. Whenever I get bitten by a mosquito or a spider, my skin inflates like a balloon so I'm pretty sure I have an extra allergic reaction to bug bites that may require a steroid shot in the bum. It's laughable right? Seems a bit crazy, I know. But I finally understand why I'm so paranoid.

I know things could be a whole lot worse. I know I'm lucky to have a functioning body and beyond that a wonderful life. But it is hard having scoliosis and I wish so badly I didn't have it. The thought of going through another medical journey like I did with my back frightens me to death. I understood from the age of 11 that I am not indestructible. I understood more or less that my future was that of spinal uncertainty, a long horrid drawn out process of not knowing. And being in this uncertainty is awful. I'm not too keen on being a time bomb you know. I think what I'm trying to say is that my back and its possibility to get worse as the years go on has caused me to think about the rest of my body and its possibility to get worse. Anyway, I suppose because I don't want anything else to go wrong, I freak out the moment something does and my uncertain nerves take the reigns diagnosing simple cuts as infected gashes or moles as malignant skin cancer.

I don't want a pity party, I don't like complaining and I don't want to come off weak. I'm healthy and just fine. I promised I would write more so how did you like that spoon full of my guts?

Boohoo I want to cry

Sigh. I'm supposed to be detached from money... so doesn't that mean I can spend 575 dollars on these beauties???? Boohoo I'll try to justify it someday. Nordstorm.

Brown sugar soul

Motivation - Kelly Rowland ft. Lil Wayne


Get It Together - India Arie


You Know I'm No Good - Amy Winehouse


How To Love - Lil' Wayne

State of Denial

My voicemail message says something about how I'm in Ecuador and that I'll probably never get the message so email is the best bet on contacting me. Every time someone leaves me a voice message they say the following: "Maryam, time to change your voicemail!! You're not in Ecuador anymore!" And every time I hear that, I cringe. I push it aside and I focus on something else. I'm in a state of denial that goes way deeper than just resisting the fact that I'm here and not there.

I don't dream often. When I do dream it's either some really REALLY weird shiz or those deep inner concerns I don't dare face when I'm conscious. The other night I dreamt I was someone else (some old friend) who ran into myself after years of no contact. It was a couple of years in the future but I looked somewhat the same, maybe a bit more tired from studying. I (as the friend) asked myself how the Baha'i activities were and then the perception switched. I was myself again, looking at an old friend, too ashamed to answer the question. I was completely distant from Baha'i activities and God.

It was easy concentrating on being a Baha'i day to day in Ecuador... but it's another thing transferring that to my sweet home. And my way with dealing with it is not dealing with it. But that habit will change of course and my state of denial will change of course and that dream will never be a reality of course. It's just frightening... it's not easy being a Baha'i. We're not called the spiritual descendants of the Dawn-Breakers for nothing.

SO ANYWAY my big point is that my blog is a reflective tool and since I've been in too much denial to do any retrospective/reflecting - I've really slacked on dear old blogger. But trust me - school is starting in a week so I'll be taking any chance to procrastinate :P

Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings

My buddy Artemis plays Coltrane at the office as he performs angiograms for patients. He also taught me how to take color photos today with the angiogram camera. Have I mentioned how much I love it here??

I'm now taking OCTs, doing histories, and taking eye pressures. I'm learning SO much, it's incredible and I'm enjoying myself thoroughly.

Besides that, I've been telling new from Maryam's imagination bed time stories to my cousins. Last night I told Juliet and Maya a story about a pink unicorn named Stacey who learned how to fly from her teacher Mr. George the Happy Monkey where they lived in a land of purple grass and blue tree trunks and yellow and teal polka dotted leaves with rainbow skies and glitter rain. To say my girl cousins are girly girls is an understatement.

Once I told my cousin, Max, a story about a Purple Dragon named Steve who searched far and wide for good qualities but got deceived by Sam the Green Serpent. In the end, Steve, the Purple Dragon, found those beautiful qualities hidden within himself. Hahahah! I know I got Aesop Fables on that one.

Maybe tomorrow night I'll tell them a story about a young girl who traveled to a crazy city and got stuck playing hair salon and monopoly and house and play doh and computer games and reading stories with three crazy (but beautiful) kids. :P

Bluety and the Beast

My four year old cousin Juliet (Juju) has pictures of Disney princesses all over her pink painted flower decorated room walls. She used to call Beauty in Beauty and the Beast "Bluety" and the only way to avoid a water-works-tantrum show when it's bedtime is to tell her that only princesses brush their teeth.

Today was cool.
1. Scoliosis doctor. I'm doing fine.
2. Layli's improv show. She was so great.
3. Harry Potter Exhibit. Acquisition of the Marauder's Map :)
4. Froyo with the kids.
5. I finally cleaned my room.
6. Saw this picture of my students/friends from Otavalo graduating :)

I'm not sure what's going on with me and you, Mr. Blog. Maybe I'm so tired and exhausted I can't be bothered to say hello. It's not you, it's me. Maybe we should take a break? I just feel like we're going in different directions here.

Just kidding - I'll be back in the swing of writing and posting pretty pictures of well styled skinny photoshopped unrealistic women soon. LIKE RIGHT NOW

The following is an nice summary of my style. Olala I sound so posh having a "style" lol. Today I saw the rainbow belt Emma Watson wore as Hermione in the Prisoner of Azkaban and I drooled. That belt sparked my first interest in the beauty and art and fun in fashion.

thisisglamorous

She was 14, I was 13. Sigh. I even went to Target and bought a rainbow belt just like it. I love her. And her costume designer for that movie.

DUST STORM???

What the heck?????????? What's going on in my cactus land?

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/video/2011/jul/06/phoenix-arizona-dust-storm-video

I'm a I'm a tech!

So. I'm back from PA and I'm in the city and over the past two days I have become an eye-tech-college-student-rockstar-citygirl. I don't know much of anything... but I'm learning a lot.

Here are the constituents of my Technician-ship:
- Vision testing. I record the patient's eye sight and their eye pressure. You know that huge E with all those other letters? Yeah, I can do that! I can also stick a pressure measuring instrument on someone's eye... hehehe.
- Dilating pupils (using eye drops).
- Prepping injections. I usually just do this for my uncle. Before he comes in the patient's room, I prep their eyes for the injection. I clean their eyes, using eye drops and then I take out all his surgical instruments and get it all orderly for him. The worst part is watching their flinching reactions to the needle. I think that's the worst injection out there... because you see it coming and we're not used to feeling a pinch in that area of the body.
- Vision field tests. This is a test that is ordered sometimes to look at the patient's peripheral vision. It's pretty sucky for the patient. And a lot of waiting for me.
- OCT scans. I think I'll eventually learn how to take OCT scans, which are basically 3D pictures of a cross section of the retina.
-Spanish translator. I translated for 3 different procedures today! My spanish was a bit rusty... and their spanish is very different that what I'm used to, so it was a bit rough, but I managed. I need to find out how to say macular degeneration (along with an entire list of new retinal related vocab) in spanish. O Dios mio.

You know what's cool besides learning a lot of medical terminology/anatomy/physiology and doing a lot of hands-on patient care and actually being part of IT all???? IT'S THAT I LOVE IT!!! Sigh, smile, eye flutter, cue the song and I sing with rosy cheeks of my sanguine dreams to inject people and take their blood over the rainbow to discover their bodily sorrows and send them home with happy pills.
Ojalá, algún día.

Well, tomorrow is my day off and I'm taking Layli to Soho. Peace out girl scout

Relishing in HP's Sweat

Hi. I'm in New York at my Uncle's place... and I just sat front row for a show on Broadway. It's called How To Succeed in Business Without Really Trying.

Guess who's the main role aka Finch?
Daniel Radcliffe.

Guess who was the young man posted all over my bedroom walls through out my junior high years?
Daniel Radcliffe.
He's also pasted inside the front cover of my journal.

So basically... HARRY POTTER WAS AN ARM'S LENGTH AWAY FROM ME. Unfortunately, I failed to make eye contact with him. But, in the end - the show was lovely, he sang very well and I loved it.

Well, I'm off to the Poconos in PA for the holiday weekend.I'll see you again Mr. Radcliffe in a couple of weeks on that big screen. Sigh.

I mean sigh

Seriously in love with these girls and their music. I want to be a mermaid.


My bro gave me two cds for my bday. He burned songs from the past year - things I missed out on while I was in Ecuador. I found this one and now my heart is bumping.

Nicki Minaj - Super Bass

At Bosch, Yo signed in on his netflix account on my compu and told me to watch whatever I please. So.... I will now go watch what I please, which is Funny Girl.

Jill Greenberg

"Back in 2008, Greenberg was commissioned to shoot a commercial fashion spread with the US Olympic Synchronized Swim Team, which asked the ladies to wear high heels. Struck by the absurdity of it all, Greenberg was inspired to create a fine art set that would show the "tension of her models coming to the surface gasping for air while wrestling with the weight of the water as a metaphor for the role women must play in the outside world."


Ay ay ay. Incredible!

Leggo

A time warp? Black holes? Twilight zones? I can't explain the surges in reality's movement from being the present to a memory.

6/14 - So, I'm 20! Feliz cumple! I had a really nice birthday with my brother, sister, and my parents. We ate at my favorite place, Joe's Farm House. I stuffed my face. Then we saw Super 8 and went shopping! I bought some really nice kicks and then came home to eat pizza from Oreganos with the fam again.

6/16 - BOSCH! I co-directed Children's Academy and we had the most AMAZING counselors with superb teachers and it ran so smoothy and perfect and beyond all I could've imagined. I'm so incredibly thankful for Melanie. She's quite possibly the most capable and creative and organized person I know. She really did a lot and I just don't know how I could've done it alone. And I love her.

So now I'm sitting here in Martha Root Hall, happy as can be. And I'm allowing myself to digest more of Ecuador, a lot of new music and some cookies. Jordan walks in every so often and life gets that much better.



I'm really really jazzed on jazz. Hahah bad joke whatever.

MG found home

Did you know that the mattress on my bed is magical? I really don't mean that in a dirty way. Exactly one week ago, I laid down on it for the first time in 10 months and it was like my tired, sick, parasite filled body was infixed in it's fibrous memory as it enveloped my bones into a state of complete comfort and peace.

I'll break down the week. It's one worth breaking down. It all starts at my surprise goodbye party.

Wed 6/1 - After school, I went out to lunch with the profesores. Paolo, who doesn't eat meat, was given a plate with a chicken part and a piece of steak. I looked over at him with a confused face, he smiled and pointed to his girlfriend, Paola. I remember thinking about how much I'd miss the fearless eating style of the Ecuadorian women as I watched her finish her plate and Paolo's meat.

That same evening, my friends threw me a surprise party. I danced my heart out. My high school students were there along with my friends from the Baha'i community. Even Mauro came in all the way from the coast! Near the middle of the night, they paused to present me with a gift... a beautifully hand carven wooden case. After, they all took turns to say something to me. I cried when Valerie started to speak. She looked and me and just said "I don't think there's really any words" and just like that the first tear rolled off my cheek.

Thur 6/2 - My friends left. The biggest heartbreak of my life. We were all in tears... so much sadness and so much love. AH I miss them so much. They went to the coast for a meeting along with Jose Luis, the counselor. I haven't been able to get in touch with them since... The next day I said goodbye to the kids at the school, Geoconda and Bahieh.

Sat 6/4 - My last day in Otavalo. I woke up with a stomach ache... which soon turned into throwing up and a lot of pain. My buddies, the parasites, came back for my despedida. But I had already said my goodbyes to everyone the couple of days before, so I basically was confined to the house. Which sucked... but what can you do. I said goodbye to Kendy and Dagmar and left at 2 am for the airport.

Sun 6/5 - Sitting in the Houston airport after talking to Avianca on the phone about my lost baggage stuck in Colombia, a middle aged man comes over and asks to borrow a pen. It took me a minute to realize he asked me in spanish. He was traveling back to San Salvador. He had been living illegally in Texas for 18 years. He spoke of the turmoil he saw growing up in his country, of the general loss in morality he sees happening now in the world, of the pain from war and the need for action to put the ourselves back together. I wasn't even home and I was already using my spanish to have a conversation of significance, of meaning. How's that for confirmation, Musonda? Yellow birds anyone?

My parents, Layli, Caleb and Jessica met me at the airport with signs and hugs.
I was so tired and exhausted - mainly from traveling for 20 hrs and from the parasites - that the moment I took my shoes off and stepped bare footed on the carpet, my legs turned to jelly.
Mazzie gave me kisses.
I showered feeling gluttonous using so much water.
I accidentally spoke to the receptionist at urgent care in spanish the following day.
I gawked at the prices of soap at Target and played the piano for a good two hours.


So. How do I feel? I have no idea. I'm still processing it. I do know that I miss it. It = Jose Luis's guitar, Edgar's smiles, Mauro's friendship, Valerie's companionship, Julian's jazz, Martin's hugs, Rosita's eyebrows, Alejandro's brother (lol), Geoconda's laughs, Jose Luis A's advise, Freddy's faces, Danny's chokes, Kendy's eyes, Dagmar's attitude...

But it is nice to be home. The Layli Monster has mounted a horse and is now galloping around in ancient middle times as my brother occasionally glances over from his world of smash cuts, voice overs and dialogues to chuckle as she dies for the 5th time.

4 year olds and Billy Joel

I LOVE BILLY JOEL. Thank you Dad for playing his records sunday mornings.



Yes... sometimes I threaten my pre schoolers into behaving well by saying they won't go home if they don't behave well............... I'm not a real teacher ok?

:P

I'm my mother's daughter :)

Chachimbido

I went to some hot water springs pools in Chachimbido over the weekend with the family and Valerie's sister Cori. I helped teach Dagmar and Kendy how to swim. It was so so fun.

Sesame Street Zombies

HAHA! Genius idea. Evan Cheng

ARIZONA

So... maybe I am looking forward to going home. Birthday plans? A sunrise hike. Which might just turn into a sunrise watch depending on the heat. Don't want to die on my first day as not a teenager. That would suck.

1, 2, 3

Butterflies

It's so crazy how many butterflies have been fluttering around in my stomach this past weekend. Even Darwin would be impressed.

The Diva butterfly flew around for a bit before I performed (again) songs I barely knew the words too. My favorite piece of the evening was My Favorite Things (hence the Coltran post below). I felt like a Maria on jazz crack.

And THEN parasite butterflies. Yes yes, I got parasites. It was glorious. Grand. My new best friends those pesky parasites. Have I mentioned that I love sarcasm?

And then the love butterflies of being in love with a 4 year old named Kendy. We baked some brownies for Feast last night and he paused his bowl-licking to tell me that he wants a chocolate cake for his 5th birthday. His birthday is in November. I pretended to go to the bathroom so I could cry.

So all these butterflies, heart aches, kicking and screaming, "i don't wanna go don't make me go", sick of teaching attitudes suck... but then I remember when 7 year old Miguel pulled a box cutter out in art class and started swinging it around and how in my broken spanish I somehow managed to pull it out of his hands without getting myself or other children stabbed and suddenly, going home doesn't seem so scary.


There's absolutely no link between this song and this post. I just like the song.

Coltrane and Rusted Root

And this picture blows my mind. yayeveryday

eyesores

CACTUSLAND!!!
26 days and I'll be there...
I'm also a big fan of the second picture posted. I want a poster size of it hanging on my wall some day.
yayeveryday

The Shamim Post

Today, 21 years ago, my best friend was born.
Feliz cumple Shamz, de un siervo a un otro.

maquillaje

Just because I've been slacking on posting doesn't mean I still haven't been drooling over beautifully composed outfits and glamorous compositions.

Toni Carrn by David Slijper for Elle France
I'm not much of a makeup girl but these are divine. And way photoshopped...

Manta/Tosagua/Santa Rosa

This is inspired by Valerie's spanish blog post. You can copy and paste everything I write into google translate, here!

MANTA

- Me fui a visitar mi amigito Alejandro en la costa con la Valerie.

- Le conocí a su familia. Su hermano, Omid, es mi otro mejor amigo. Tengo bastante mejor amigos. No diga nada a Ruhi...

- Nos fuimos a la playa. Cada día. Fue incrediiiiible. No estoy acostumbrada a nadar en el mar, entonces fue una experiencia tan chevere. Antes, nunca nadaba mucho en el mar... solo en los piscinas de mi tierra desierto. Ah cactus.

- Había muchos gusanos de arena... no me gustó.

- Comí pizza con Juan y Luchito

- Me fui a conocer los abuelos de Alejo. Sus abuelos son de Iran, entonces solo me hablaron en persa. Y también, me mostraron muchos vídeos de danzas irani... jajajaj fue muy linda y bien divertido.
- Jugué con el Alejo (o Tuti) el juego de los pies y el esfero. Le gané.
- Si hubiera un Tsunami en Manta, la casa de Alejo todavia viviria
- Una vez, estábamos comiendo helado en un heladero y un niño pobre estuvo a la esquina mirando nos y a los helados con ojos tristes y maravillas. Se parecía que no había comido en años. Creo que este niño trabajaba en algo muy duro porque tenia un fundo pesado a su lado. Entonces, Alejandro se acercó y le ofreció un helado. Después, me di las llaves de la casa y se fue con el niño a ayudar con su trabajo, llevando todo mientras que el niño comió su heladito.
- Aprendí a leer y escribir persa!

TOSAGUA/CANOA
- En el bus de Manta a Tosagua, habían dos hombres musicales. Nos presentaron un show de hip-hop. Y en realidad, fue muy buena!! Sus letras hablaban sobre queriendo mejorar el mundo. Entonces les compré su CD. Me siento que mi contribución pequeña va a ayudar el mundo en uno manera o otro.
- Conocí a la familia de Mauro. Viven a lado de un cementerio... que es raros pero no me importa. Quiero vivir allá con su familia. Por siempre.
- Fuimos al río con FABRI y Alejandro. Crucé al otro lado con Alejo aunque el corriente era muy fuerte. Y después, nos siguieron Valerie y Fabri. Mas tarde, subimos un monte pequeño de tierra y me zambullí como un pro :P
- La próxima dia, fuimos a la playa en Canoa. Teníamos a cruzar el parte donde el mar alcanza al rio en un bote y después llegamos a la playa. Jugamos fútbol y volley :) Y comimos pescado. YUM
- Había la reunión a elegir la asemblia espiritual de Tosagua, entonces fuimos y quedemos hasta 11 en la noche, conversando y jugando y riendo con las Baha'is de la comunidad. Tanta alegría, tanto amor, tanta unidad.
- Las calles en Tosagua no tienen cemento. Todo es hecho de lodo... y tambien llovió muchismo. Mis zapatos son demasiados sucios... pero no importa.

SANTA ROSA - La Convención Nacional de Ecuador
- El viaje de Tosagua me cansó mucho. Viajamos por mas que 12 horas en bus. AHH. Finalmente, llegamos al Instituto de Santa Rosa. Era un lugar tan hermosa con tantos flores y jardines con una vista de la cuidad y sus montañas.
- Les encontré a mis amigos de todos los lados del Ecuador. Me pusó super feliz y nos acompañaron a la casa de Emily, mi amiga de Chicago. Yo, Shirin, Valerie y Emily trabajemos hasta 2:30 en la mañana, preparando por la clase de niños y el grupo prejovenil. Compusé mi cancion en este noche... :)
- Las próximas dos días, ayude con la clase de niños. Ruhi estuvo. Creo que jugué con el mas que lo ayudé al clase... pero no importa :P
- Escuche a las charlas del Consejero Almeida y unos consultaciones de los delgados.
- La parte que fue la mas especial fue cuando les despide a mis amigos. Tenía agua en mis ojos. Pero todo bien.

Ok so I'm done with the spanish now. Remember earlier when I was whining about my spanish skills? Now I'm whining about going. Waaaa, whine, waa, whine.

I have so much to learn, so much to share, so much to study, so much to teach. It's overwhelming. But it helps to keep in mind that I'm not alone.

-I've got Jose Luis Perugachi, who calls me brother because he never remembers that hermana actually means sister, who can tutor the shiz out of Book 7 and make you so excited and ready to serve the world, you just want to run around from place to place being a servent.
-I've got Julian, who doesn't believe in a God, but sees the need to better the world and likes the spirit and programs that the Faith has to offer, so he animates a junior youth group and he believes that people should get passionate about things, about real things, things of significance.
-I've got Kendy, my four year old neighbor who whipsers "I love you" in my ears as we watch the Lion King in English together and has memorized two English prayers, constantly sings We Are Drops, and walks into our house everyday asking to help wash the dishes.

On a separate note, I've changed a lot. In ways that I'm not so sure of, ways I can't quite put a finger on yet. But, what I can see is that it's powerful, it's weak, it's grand and it's small. And that's really exciting.

Corazones - MY FIRST ORIGINAL SONG!!!

Hi, I'm back and I had a ball. I'll post more about my amazing week later... but right now I can't hold in the excitement and I have to post this video. I WROTE MY FIRST SONG.
Hooooola, ya regresé y me fue tan linda. Voy a escribir mas sobre esta semana pasada mas luego... pero por ahora, no puedo esperar no mas! Tengo que compartir eso video. COMPUSE MI PRIMERA CANCION!!!



The story:
I wrote this song for the children of the national convention in Santa Rosa. I was inspired by thinking of kids frolicking in fields of fairyfluff, singing songs of sweet melodies with bellies full of laughter and love. I'll record it officially this weekend I hope. Wow I am so thankful for that microphone, J. Really, best gift ever.
Escribí esta canción por los niños en la convención nacional en Santa Rosa. La idea de niños corriendo en campos de flores de belleza, cantando canciones de melodías dulces con caras llenas de risas y amor me inspiró. Espero que pueda gravarlo pronto. :)

Translation of the prayer

I'm off!!

Manta, Tosagua, Santa Rosa

Be back 4/25

PEACE

"En breve, que cada uno de vosotros sea como una lámpara brillando con la luz de las virtudes del mundo de la humanidad. Sed dignos de confianza, sinceros, afectuosos y plenos de castidad. Estad iluminados, sed espirituales, sed divinos, sed gloriosos, apresuraos hacia Dios, sed bahá'ís." - 'Abdu'l-Bahá

Maryam The Diva

Uhhhhh so they liked us so much they asked us to come back and sing AGAIN!
Which is awesome because my videos/recording failed the first night we played.

Awesome things that happened:
1. People from the first night we played came back to see us again! You can hear they call out my name in summertime. EEEEE GROUPIES?????? Lol jk.
2. It's more of a cafe/restaurant than an actual bar... so we ate. And when I went to pay my tab, the lady said "oh no you don't pay! no worries" OMG FREE FOOD
3. The owner asked for my number so he could call me to come play more. WHAT? I'M A LOCAL BAR SINGER????????

Wawaweewaa so fun.

The Red Pub

So. Last week, Julian asked me to sing with him and his jazz teacher at a bar. I practically jumped up and down at the idea of it. Anyway, last night was the gig and it was super chill, laid back and very jazz. It was cool being the person that I always saw in pubs and bars around the world, sharing their love for music in a fun, who-cares, intimate setting.

I sang:
Summertime, I've Got You Under My Skin, Body and Soul, I Could Write a Book, Shadow of Your Smile, Nature Boy

I played the keys for:
Blue Monk, Footprints, Straight No Chaser

And I wasn't even NERVOUS. Dang I love being a diva. Divalicious. Divaland. Diva.