Woes and Ohs

Things here have been crazy. The loops and drops featured in a year-of-service-rollercoaster are arduous. I can't write much about it but I can say that my NGO project unexpectedly and unwillingly halted, despite its thriving rate of potentiality. Needless to say, I'm bummed. Not for the NGO, I never expected it to have such a latent response, but for the reasons it stopped.

I was talking with my friend yesterday, my student Julian actually... but he's more a friend than a student... but anyway, we were talking about many topics but mainly about ma ma ma music.

It's so cliche. Everyone loves music. Everyone is passionate about it which usually makes me want to hate it. But, I can't. Not when it does SO much. So me and emotions don't really work well together. I know when to put aside emotions for the benefit of practicality. Thinking back to the times of my scoliosis brace, I remember feeling the hate for the brace, the self pity, the embarrassment... but those feelings would come in pangs, little twinges, because my determination to deal with it dominated it all.

I like that about myself in ways. It's a confirmation for my medical aspirations. In other ways, it really makes it hard to figure out how I feel about certain things. Especially when it comes to romance. Hopefully I shouldn't have to worry about that because I've got a Persian uncle in Canada hunting down a list of suitors for me. Which, if you think about it, wouldn't make for a bad reality show. 

However, with music... especially when I sing classical music, I release. I actually feel. The thrill of performing comes from being vulnerable. When I perform, I'm exposed. I share a glimpse of my soul with complete strangers. The raw-unfiltered-pure emotion gushes through my veins. Oh the drama, oh the passion, oh the heart.

So... yeah I like music.

***
I think this might be Plan D... ballet. But speaking of ballet, I finally saw Black Swan last night. I was watching it on my computer as all the lights were out in the entire city. Probably not the smartest idea I've had... but it was still a great movie. Favorite blog, I love you.

Ruh'u'llah/Ruhi

Introducing my best friend, Ruhi.

I'm starting an NGO

I think.

This is going to be fun.

More about this soon...

"¡Oh amigos! ¡Si tan sólo pudiera caminar por esas regiones, aunque fuese a pie y en condiciones de pobreza total, levantando la llamada de ‘Ya Bahá’u’l-Abhá’ en las ciudades, los pueblos y las montañas, los desiertos y los océanos, promulgando así las divinas Enseñanzas." 'Abdu'l-Bahá

Naw-Ruz

Happy Naw-Ruz! Happy eating! Happy new year! HAPPINESS

I had the best Naw-Ruz of my life. Last night I danced for hours. HOURS. I danced San Juan, the indigenous cultural dance. I danced merengue. I danced salsa. I danced bachata. I danced reggaeton. I danced house music. I DANCED MY BUTT OFF.

But the best, sweetest, most special part of it all was when I danced with Ahmad. Ahmad is 5 years old and is in my kindergarden class. He's been a special friend of mine ever since we played tag for hours at the indigenous wedding I went to earlier this year. Anyway, at the Naw-Ruz party last night, he saw me standing alone. So, he left his mother, came up to me (on his own), grabbed me by the hem of my shirt, pulled me onto the dance floor, held my hands, and started to dance.

I don't think I can remember feeling so much happiness. So much joy. I really really love where I am. And I don't just mean where I am as in Otavalo, Ecuador.

I was honored to perform these two songs with Sr. Consejero Almeida (Counselor Almeida). J - we're recording/performing Queen of Carmel this summer.

Amame Ukulele Cover

Elika is visiting Valerie and she can beat box!! Gangster gangster

I would be alright if I never saw another slug again in my life. They come out of our sink every night and crawl their yucky green slimy selves all around the bathroom. It's really gross. And now there's baby slugs which makes me think about how slugs reproduce... gross.

Guide Me - Kelsey Bulkin

FINALLY
Got a cover done. I have been so musically dead recently. My voice sucks these days and I have no patience with the ukulele. I'm going through a phase. It's like writer's block but for singing. There's an ice box where my voice box used to be. And that's a bad joke.
But hey guess what... I HAVE A MICROPHONE. Weeeee it sounds so pretty. THANK YOU J

ASOS & my future

1. I've been on the hunt for an affordable-Maryam-classy dress to wear to Paula and Robbie's wedding in September in Chicago. Finally found it and guess what?? Out of stock in my size. Thank you world, thank you. But, the upside is that I really enjoy the style of this particular European brand. ASOS.

Fairy Godmother... bibbidi bobbidi boo?

2. I love children. I can't wait to have my own. Actually I can, but you get the point. The point is is that my world explodes every day when I walk into 3rd grade and the entire class practically runs up and bear hugs me. Or when 3 year old Andre (with his eyebrows) stares at me in the kinder/pre-kinder bus only then to ask me (in English) "how are you today" with out a smile or even a tiny twitch of his face. Or in 1st grade, when even after putting Juan David or Miguel or Alec or Joel in time out, they still run up and give me hugs goodbye. Or how Adonis from 6th grade saves a seat for me on the bus ride home. The constant love is so uplifting and I can't help but be so happy around them.

Anyway. My recent obsession with children had left me thinking crazy thoughts... thoughts leaning towards maybe being a kindergarden teacher. Which is kinda crazy but it really makes a lot of sense. So anyway, I told Nabil about it when I was in Cuenca. He asked me why I'm not pursuing that. I told him I want to be a doctor more. So then he told me quite simply "why don't you be a pediatrician" and then bam whoosh click, I felt this 'YES' feeling hit me in my gut. And now it all just... works.

Before now, I couldn't imagine myself as a doctor. Now I can't get the image out of my head.

ELLIOT IS HOME

E for 3 is back!


Elliot was my date for junior prom. He's 6'7. I'm 5'4. It was fun.

saturday morning music

These songs have been on repeat alllllll morning.



1. I think I might just name my daughter Adele after that.
2. Her middle name could be Colbie.
3. I didn't show the video for numbero 3 because Miley Cyrus is in it. But it's The Big Bang from Rock Mafia

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESSICA SHMESSICA MY ASIAN!!!!

UP from National Geographic

Kevin? NG

I vent to Cuenca

Khello! I am back from Cuenca. Four day incredible trip to visit Nabil and his parents in the southern Sierra. Such a wonderful time with such a wonderful family. His madar espeke Farsi so I espoke Farsi wit her and I vas vedy vedy khappy.

Our daily schedule consisted of the following.
1. Waking up and stuffing our faces for the Fast then going back to sleep.
2. Waking up again and helping Nabil's mom cook dinner for expecting guests
3. Read/nap/watch Mr. Bean
4. Welcome guests and break the fast along with lots of laughs and stories and new friendships.

My favorite part was number 3. We watched so much Bean. We even watched how Bean was created. But we also read a lot. I read my book, The Master in Akka, and Nabil read his, Conscious Courtship. We traded books one day and I found the book really really interesting. The first couple of chapters are about self growth and discovery along with understanding the 'shadow self' and personal investigation.

Honestly, I really suck at the whole personal investigation. I have no idea how to read myself let alone express it. But I found this quote that I LOVE and it is perfect for the Fast.

One of the most significant steps in developing self-knowledge happens when we awaken our ability to make choices and to take conscious responsibility for them. This entails coming to terms with wounds of our past and to develop a positive, forward-looking orientation to our future possibilities. Taking responsibility for our ability to choose our actions, to get past blame and resentment, can awaken in us a healthy respect for our place in the universe and to discover our purpose for being here." - Raymond Switzer.

Mmm. Khinteresting.

Right so don't pay attention to the smooching... just look at those BOOTS. Gorgeous. With the cute little leg warmers sticking out. AH, melt.

Me in Ecuador

My mom likes to remind me to actually be in the pictures I take. So, thanks to Valerie's iPhoto, I'm only posting pictures of... well... me. But. Who cares. I find them comical. Especially the banana phone.

Get the flash player here: http://www.adobe.com/flashplayer

Before I die wall

Candy Chang "I turned the side of an abandoned house in my neighborhood into a giant chalkboard where residents can fill in the blank and remember what is important to them in life."

Muahaha.

MY FAVORITE TIME OF THE YEAR

THE FAST!
SO EXCITED, YOU GUYS HAVE NO IDEA
jes!



I like this song too.
Rihanna - Raining Men (feat. Nicki Minaj)